Leaving Town Alive
by dancingwithreality
Summary: Oneshot. Life is for living, forgiving and for leaving town alive... and sometimes for letting go. If it makes you cry, you owe me a review!


**FIFTEEN YEARS LATER**

Chase took a deep breath and got out of the car. He'd been sitting in the front seat for the best part of an hour, his hands clutching the wheel, just looking at the house across the street.

It was large and broad, whitewashed with a pretty latticed porch and little round window in the roof. He guessed there was a great view of the ocean from that window, across this quiet street to the beach.

He kept his mind still as he paced across the road and up the front steps of the porch, letting his feet do all the work. He knew that if he thought too much about what he was doing, he'd just turn around, get back into his car and drive off.

He hadn't seen the girl in, what, five, six years? He couldn't even remember her voice clearly. But all he remembered was the small brown-eyed girl spinning like a dynamo with energy and fire, sitting with him on the grass in idyllically hot sunshine and laughing. And all he knew was that he needed to find her and tell her fifteen years' worth of unspoken words. If he wasn't how he remembered, if she said no, if she was with someone else, if she fell into his arms to spend the rest of his life with him… it didn't matter; although obviously he would prefer the last option.

He just needed to let it go. He was in his early thirties now, broad and spare, with a kind, open face and slightly shorter, but still bushy, hair. He still felt like an observer. Girls had slipped in and out of his hand, his house, his bed, his life, yet he was completely detached from them, none of them measuring up to the one who still lingered at the back of his mind, like an imprint on his retina he couldn't blink away.

**Whisper in the ways **

**Watching days and moving on **

**You wake up every Monday then suddenly it's Sunday **

**And the week is gone **

**So till the morning breaks **

**Go and make your mistakes **

**Don't be surprised at the sunrise **

**Life is for the living, the forgiving and for leaving town alive **

He knocked on the door with a nervous cough and stepped back, hands in the back pockets of his jeans. His eyes widened as she opened the door.

She was as lovely as he remembered.

'Chase?' she asked uncertainly, surprise written on her face.

'Yeah, it's me,' he said awkwardly, waving a hand with a nervous grin. 'Hey, Zo. Uh, I hope you're not… busy, or anything…'

**Oh, do you wonder where it starts **

**Where it ends **

**What you find around the bend **

'No, no,' she said quickly. 'You want to come in?'

'Not yet, not yet,' he replied. He rubbed the back of his neck.

She nodded. 'OK… Chase, it's so good to see you. We haven't spoken in years, what are you doing here?'

He shrugged and laughed a little. 'You know, I don't know. I think I'm going kind of crazy. You just stayed on my mind, I kept wondering about you. You know, even after you moved over here, even after we lost touch… I just wondered… how you were, I guess. So I figured I'd come find out.'

**Oh, do you wonder where she's from **

**Where she goes **

**No one knows **

She smiled. 'Chase, it must have taken you days to drive over here!'

'Uh, yeah, I guess… it did. Zoey, can I… can I just talk for a minute?'

She looked mildly confused. 'Chase, sure…'

'Listen. When we were at school I had the biggest crush on you. I was head over heels in love with you, and even when we went to different colleges and moved to different states and went different ways, no one… no one measures up to you, Zo. And I… I just wanted to tell you,' he finished lamely. 'I brought you some flowers,' he added, holding up the roses. They were dark red, and sorrowful in their beauty, as if they knew it wouldn't last.

**Now and then you wonder **

**Why you're spending all your money **

**Ain't it funny how she walks on by? **

**She had you all believing **

**Now she's leaving for no reason **

**And you're wondering why **

Zoey took them with a sigh. 'Chase, wow. I just… wow. You were my best friend, Chase. My best friend, and I guess there was always that wondering… you know how it is, boys and girls being friends, you always wonder a little.' She laughed self-consciously before meeting his eyes. 'I had no idea there was anything serious for you.' She reached up to push back a stray brown hair, and it was then he saw it.

'Oh, God. Oh, wow. You're married.'

Her eyes widened, then she raised her hand and examined the gold band around her finger. 'Yeah,' she said simply. 'We have a little girl.'

Chase swallowed, and nodded. 'It's a good house for her to grow up in. A good home.'

'Yeah, it is.'

Chase shuffled his feet for a moment, then looked up at the roof of the porch. 'Is he a good husband? A good father? Is he… is he a good guy?'

Zoey felt her tears beginning to form in the rim of her eyes. 'Yes, very good.'

He nodded. 'Good.' Looking around awkwardly and blinking hard, he shrugged and offered a weak smile. 'So… that's it.'

She nodded, folding her arms and holding herself in. 'I guess… I guess, yeah, it is.'

'Do you think?... No. I'm sorry. Never-never mind.' He looked up at her, his stare naked. 'Goodbye, Mrs… what's your surname now?'

'Brooks-Carpenter.' She smiled. 'I wouldn't lose the good ol' Brooks name.'

'Good for you. Good for you. Well, goodbye, Mrs Brooks-Carpenter. You take care now.'

'Goodbye, Chase,' she said quietly, as he turned and walked away. She shut the door softly as he opened the door of his car and sat down, and looking through the window, she could see the tears streaming down his face, like a mirror held to her own. But as she watched, he leaned his head back against the seat and smiled, even choked out a laugh through the tears.

It was the enjoying of the moment, of the people, and the letting go and the recognition that the moments and the people move on, sometimes without you, sometimes you without them. That is life. In all its impermanence, its turning kaleidoscope of constantly changing moments and people, the greatest glory and the greatest beauty is that in the end, there is only love. The love endures. He knew that now. The love endures. But he can go on and live his life and love some more, knowing he can put her to rest this time around.

He turned the keys in the ignition and pulled out from the kerb. She kissed her hand and touched it to the window as she watched it pull away.

**  
And that's the way this wheel keeps working now  
That's the way this wheel keeps working now  
And I won't be the last  
No I won't be the last,  
To love her **

And you can't build a house of leaves  
And live like it's an evergreen  
It's just a season thing  
It's just this thing that seasons do

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now  
That's the way this wheel keeps working now  
And you won't be the first  
No you won't be the first  
To love me

You can find me, if you ever want again  
I'll be around the bend  
I'll be around the bend  
I'll be around,  
I'll be around  
And if you never stop when you wave goodbye  
You just might find if you give it time  
You will wave hello again  
You just might wave hello again

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now  
That's the way this wheel keeps working now

You can't love too much, one part of it  
I believe that my life's gonna see  
The love I give  
Return to me

/-------------------------/----------------------------/-----------------------/-------------------/

Oh, hope you liked it! Getting quite tearful writing this myself… how sad… Anyway to give credit where credit is due, the songs are:

**Leaving Town Alive** by **Bethany Joy Lenz**

**Wheel** by **John Mayer**

Also,I confess I stole the 'good father/good' lines from the movie **The Way We Were**. See it. It makes me cry.

Please let me know what you think of this, reviews always inspire me! Love you all \m/


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